Some people have a face that tells their story. Every hardships and triumph is written in the lines on their face. These people are often a favorite subject for photographers, although they would not be considered traditionally beautiful. On the flip side, there is that stunning blonde with legs up to her ears that turns every head when she enters a room. From angel to witch and everything in between, you can’t help to form some instantaneous judgment. She is probably promiscuous. She can’t be smart.  She must be so full of herself that she can’t eat food. Her life must be perfect.

Maybe it’s the casting director in me, but I go beyond people watching. I imagine their story.  We all do this to one degree or another. It is called stereotyping, which society tells us not to do. (Society might just as well tell us not to breathe.) I think it is better to understand why we stereotype and train yourself to see beyond what is in from of our face.

People are too complex to fathom. So we tend to group them into some category to make processing the individual more manageable. What we must train ourselves to do is to be open to the unique qualities that each person possesses. You are doing yourself a disservice to avoid people you perceive as different from you. Even people you abhor may surprise you. Maybe you will never truly like them, but they are here to teach you something.

In high school I closed myself off to just about everyone. That group is too brainy; the other group is too brawny. They were snobs, sluts, bible thumpers, drug addicts, or racists. It was easy to justify not getting to know any of these people once I sorted them into neat piles. I even took stereotyping in another direction in deciding some were not the person they appeared to be:  a creature dubbed “Poser”.  I held everyone in supreme judgment and few were perfect enough to be my friend.  In reality, I was the snob.

I realized my first year of college that I could be friends with people with different views than me, and not compromise who I am. There was no need to conform to fit neatly into any box, or to change their viewpoint to match my own. I discovered the joy of relishing in our differences. By looking past that first impression I discovered a world of knowledge and realized all the fun that I’d been missing.

What are you missing when you pass judgment on that gorgeous blonde? The story is there, and it might not be as pretty as her face.  My friend’s think I’m kidding when I say I feel sorry for the wealthy, and the very beautiful.  They have problems, I know. (No I’m not wealthy, nor do I have delusions of being a great beauty.) I know a lot of very attractive, unhappy people. For starters they have people who think they are dumb or who only like them for their looks. They have pressure on them to stay beautiful forever. They have parents that die, children with disabilities, and scars both inside and out.

If you have ever been misjudged you know how damaging it can be. Accept that the stereotype you assign to a fellow human being is wrong. Not the act of classification itself, but the label. Give yourself the gift of getting to know a variety of people Realize that there is beauty everywhere you choose to find it. See people with more than your eyes.

Sometimes you meet someone and you just know. There are people you meet and the bond is instantaneous, like you have always known them. This unexplainable cosmic connection, felt by us all at one point in time or another. It can happen with a co-worker, a classmate, a teacher, or a potential mate. The trouble is this feeling is often one sided and the object of your admiration wouldn’t be able to point you out in a police lineup.  If you find yourself in a police line up, by the way, then something has gone terribly wrong. It means, the person you see as a friend sees you as a stalker. If  forming meaningful relationships seems like an impossible mission for you, you’re not alone…It just feels that way.

How about we take a few steps back? Making friends, in fact meeting people, has become increasingly difficult in our high tech age.  How do you send that first text introducing yourself? What do you say, I want to meet you, can I have your digits? How socially awkward would that be? (no one says digits anymore.)  Is the only way to meet people Facebook to Facebook? Last time I checked, in real life there is no friend request button. So, what is a modern or not so modern person, in my case suppose to do? I ask because honestly, I have no idea how to connect with you kids these days. Just  today  I was asked if I have a smart phone, and my reply was “I don’t even have a dumb phone.”

Lucky for us, we are in the real world at a place called GCC where real live people walk the halls …texting to someone who is not you.  So how do you become the person on the receiving end of that tweet? My first bit of advice is to step back in time to the dark ages. Or more accurately the neon ages, the 80s.  No, I don’t expect you to put on parachute pants and hair spray your hair into a dome, that would be ridiculous. I just want you to set down your gadget and step away from the computer.  Really, I wasn’t kidding that time. Now, look around, tell me what you see. People, right? You were in a room full of people this entire time. Next, try saying something to one of them, not LOL or OMG…real words.  Tell them you like their outfit or ask to borrow their class notes. What’s that?  They are not in your class and they are wearing parachute pants… Let’s try something else then.

Common interests are a good conversation starter. Studies show it is the most effective way to meet someone that you’ll bond with.  (Okay I made that up.) If you’ll notice the flyers, and posters around campus you will discover a myriad of events sure to be of interest. (I know, first I made you stop texting and now I expect you to read something and it’s not even English class.) This past week I attended a football tailgating party, a matching game show, a wellness fair, and the movie Hunger Games.  They were all free events and they gave out food and prizes.  It surpized me more people did not attend these events. There was also a club fair showcasing a variety of clubs from anime to film to western art history. (Sorry I missed that one, but I heard it was pretty cool, as the Anime folks were in costume! Check out the club activities board for more information.

So you missed all those events because you were updating your Facebook status to “I’m bored”?  Not to worry, there are enough upcoming events to make your smart phone explode. The College Village and activities board host Dinner and a Movie every Wednesday from 5 to 7. It is a free event, you just sign up in the student union.  There is a Jim Malcolm Concert on September 21, and Rory Block will be here on Sept 27. In case you missed the posters, (look up from your phone.) there are Homecoming events on September 28 and 29 and the theme is the 80’s! You know I’m gonna be there to see the Poison and Motley Crue tribute bands. You should come also; it will give you another chance to strike up a conversation with the guy wearing parachute pants!

See you around campus,
-Rhonda

It was Independence Day on the 4th of July. Independence Day is a holiday which commemorates the adoption of the Declaration of Independence in 1776, declaring the independence of the United States from Great Britain.

On that day, I went to Kiwanis Park, had a BBQ, and played sports there. Then I watched a baseball game which was Batavia Muckdogs vs Connecticut Tigers at Dwyer Stadium. In the last inning, a home team came from behind to win, so it was very exciting!

After the game finished, I watched fireworks. To display fireworks is an traditional event since 1777. It was so beautiful and fantastic.

Yui

Today, the other international students from Japan and I went to Rochester. First, we visited the High Falls area which had beautiful buildings and nature. I haven’t been to any other cities except Batavia since I arrived here, so I was really excited to go.

After we visited the waterfall, we went shopping at the Marketplace Mall. I ate delicious Chinese food, and after that, I bought cool clothes at the shopping mall. The shopping was very enjoyable. For the last stop of the tour, we went to an Asian market in Rochester. I got excited because I found many Japanese foods.

I think this trip was very valuable. And I’m looking forward to next trip.

Yui